Hagrid KarofskyHummel
by VioletCherry342
Summary: How Xander Karofsky-Hummel got to go to Hogwarts. Day 6 of Kurtofsky week- abnormally late but at least it's up.


**~VioletCherry342~**

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_Day 6: Harry Potter/Hogwarts_

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"I still cannot believe we're doing this," David grumbled for, at least, the tenth time in the past 24 hours. Even though he sounded like a cranky bear, Kurt still could not take his unamused attitude to heart when he was wearing a fake beard that reached almost below his belt and a giant brown should-be-robe that looked more like a giant potato sack. Kurt snorted to himself at the angry look hiding under the ginormous wig and crossed his arms, careful not to teeter too much for fear he would fall off the chair he was standing on and possibly break his face. "_You_ are the one who introduced him to Harry Potter, Mr. Karofsky."

"It is a _classic_, Kurt!" David said in an almost whine. "I was not letting my son go through life not knowing about Hogwarts."

"You are a complete dork," Kurt informed him, smirking.

"Right," David snipped. "Because I am the one who sat there and doodled every scene in Hogwarts to redo the house, made costumes, got owls and wands and every ancient thing Harry Potter related so his six-year-old could have an unforgettable birthday party."

"Well, what do you expect?" Kurt asked. "He's been crying for two weeks straight because you weren't there to read him his stories before bed. I honestly could've just gotten you back for him, but...I've never been..."

"Simple?" He asked, snorting. "Poor kid..."

"I blame Rachel and Jesse- they are probably traumatizing him with their constant...constant. That's where the tears come from."

David chuckled. "You could always leave him with Burt..or my Dad..."

"With all honesty, I don't want either of them to have a stroke because our son is too much to handle." Kurt shrugged, turning around again and tacking another fake brick onto the wall.

David shook his head and smiled before moving the table back to the middle of the room. "I still don't know how you got your hands on all this stuff...It's been over 15 years since Harry Potter ended."

"I have connections," Kurt said, nodding in satisfaction at his handiwork before slowly moving off the chair and hopping over to the kitchen as the timer beeped. "So much to do, so little time."

"A.K.A., a months work of preparation to finish in eight hours," David corrected, smirking to himself when Kurt waved a hand behind him.

"Shush up, Hagrid," He said, setting the cupcakes on the counter. "Now where did I put those frogs...?"

"The decorations, the things to slip in ice cubes, or the ones for cake?"

"The latter."

"Top drawer on the right," David said, turning a cup absentmindedly. Kurt nodded his thanks and got the little wiggly things he'd practically bleached in peroxide before his phone dinged. He sighed. "So help me, if this is Rachel canceling I will _aparecium_ her..."

David let out a snort. "That's making invisible stuff appear...You're thinking '_Avada Kadavra_'."

"You are the biggest _nerd_ I have ever met," Kurt said, giggling and answering his phone. "Kurt Karofsky-Hummel."

"Hello, Mr. Karofsky-Hummel," Said a female voice, sounding somewhat exhausted and robotic. "Is this Xander Karofsky-Hummel's father?"

"Yes," Kurt answered, his eyes narrowing a little, more at the fact it appeared the school was calling than the fact the woman had to see if Xander was his kid- how many people had the hyphenated last name 'Karofsky-Hummel' in the school? "Is something wrong?"

"Xander got in a fight, here," She continued, stifling a yawn.

"Excuse me?" Kurt said, the slight grin on David face at hearing his last name after Kurt's first slowly fading at Kurt's tone. "Is he okay?"

"We'd appreciate if you'd come in," She kept going as if Kurt hadn't spoken, apparently having no concern for the worry in Kurt's voice. "If you could."

"Um..yeah, yeah, I'll be right there," Kurt said.

"Thank you."

Kurt heard a click and realized the woman had hung up on him, a little swell of anger popping in his chest. Where did she get off?

"What's going on?" David asked, his brows drawn in.

"Apparently, Xander got in a fight," Kurt said skeptically. His son was small, which was surprising since he was biologically David's, and he was a lot like him - shy, surprisingly cuddly and scared of new things - but he had picked up on Rachel's genes too - short, independent, but he was only ever loud when he had a point he wanted to get across. One thing, though; he wasn't one to get in fights. Ever.

David mirrored his facial expression. "Really."

Kurt shrugged. "I have to go down there and get him, can you...can you finish this?"

"You don't want me to go with you?" David offered, frowning.

"He doesn't know you're home yet," Kurt said. "You're one of his big birthday presents- please? Pretty please with a spell on top?"

David smiled in spite of himself, and nodded. "Fine, fine...Just knock before you come in, all right?"

"Of course." Kurt grinned and move forward, kissing David's lips around the beard gently and patted his shoulder. "I'll be back soon."

"Not too soon," David said, gesturing to the house. "Work."

Kurt chuckled and nodded. "Understood. I'll see you soon_ish_, okay?"

"Mhmm," David said with a nod, kissing Kurt's cheek again as his husband made to duck out the door. Kurt smiled before hopping into the car, driving off.

The school was only about ten minutes away, so it didn't take Kurt too long to get there and to the principles office, stepping through without knocking. The woman glanced up at him and lifted a brow. "Mr. Karofsky?"

"Yeah, I-"

"Papa?"

Kurt glanced over, seeing Xander, curly hair a mess and hazel eyes wide, a sad look on his bruised face. Kurt felt his own eyes widen, rushing over to his son and kneeling in front of him, hardly noticing the pouting boys sitting a few seats away with his son sitting here with his legs drawn up to his chest and tears rolling down his red cheeks. "Baby, what happened to you?"

"I didn't," Xander said, his voice high from trying to hold in cries. "I- I didn't st-start it, I promise..."

"I know you didn't, Xan, but...Good God, you're shaking...come here," He said, startled at seeing his baby so beat up, opening his arms which were quickly filled by his son gripping to his shirt like his life depended on it. Kurt shushed him as he tried to explain again that he didn't mean to start anything and moved to sit in the chair Xander previously held, petting at his sons curls. "Shh..."

"I'm sorry..." Xander whispered, sniffing and burrowing his face into Kurt's shoulder, repeating the statement over and over again.

"Shh," He said again. "You have nothing to be sorry for, okay? Just-"

"Alright, alright, where are my boys?" Boomed a voice from the front. Kurt looked up, rubbing his hand up and down Xander's slightly-shaking spine and watching as the tall, blonde man stormed up to the front desk. "And why was I called here from work? Surely nothing could be so important."

"Sir," The redhead at the front desk said. "Your sons got in a fight with Xander Karofsky, for why, I'm not sure, none of them wanted to talk. Kyle and Ethan say they were just playing around and Xander wanted his father present."

"Well his father better damn well be present, I do not have time for this shit," He spat. Kurt had covered Xander's ear with his palm the moment he walked in the door.

"You should watch your mouth," Kurt said, his voice holding an edge of irritation. "You are in an elementary school, after all."

"You his dad?" He asked.

"Yes, I am."

"Well why don't you teach your kid how to_ be a little thicker-skinned_?" He nearly screamed, the words directed at the small boy on Kurt's lap. Xander jumped and tried to burrow further into Kurt's arms, a tiny sob being smothered by Kurt's shirt.

"Do not talk to my son that way," Kurt growled, his voice growing loud and clear as if he were on Broadway and not in a little school.

"O-"

"Sirs," The redhead said. "If you two would please go speak to Principle Reece, that would be much appreciated."

Kurt, always being one to listen when told how to 'manage' things, promptly stood up and settled Xander on his arm, stomping over to the closed door and shoving it open, not bothering to hold it open for the man and his two sons. He didn't figure he owed that much respect to such a tool.

"Mr. Karofsky-Hummel, Mr. Elliot," Principle Reece said, standing up and nodding at the men in her office. Kurt nodded at her, while the man, Elliot, just grunted and gestured for Kyle and Ethan to take a seat in the chairs in front of her desk. Kyle did so, while Ethan huffed angrily and glared at the chairs before stamping over and falling into the second one. Kurt rolled his eyes, remaining in his standing position and swaying his weight from foot to foot in some attempt to calm his son.

"All right, boys," Principle Reece, her nameplate reading 'Abby' as her first name, asked the two boys sitting in front of her. "Parents are here...do you wanna talk now?"

Kyle shook his head and Ethan let out a huff. "It's Xander's birthday, today. We were just giving him his...seven punches."

"And one for luck," Kyle added. "Eight each."

Elliot chuckled and shook his head. Kurt scowled. "And how hard did you hit my son, you little barbarians?"

"Not that bad."

"Xander?" Abby asked.

"Yes, ma'am?" Xander asked quietly, blinking at her tearfully. Kurt frowned and kissed his temple, bouncing him gently and trying to make him sound less heartbroken.

"What happened to you?" She asked.

"They..."

Kurt hugged him a little tighter, lifting his brows. "You're safe, kiddo..."

Xander hid his face in Kurt's shoulder, muttering to his dad instead of to the whole room before looking at him apologetically and resting his cheek on Kurt's shoulder. Kurt growled. "So, you held him down...while your brother hit him."

"He kept squirming!" Kyle exclaimed as if that explained it all..

"Because you little criminals were hurting him!" Kurt yelled, cupping the back of Xander's head and glowering at the father. "You should be ashamed of how you raised these two."

"At least they have a mother," He said disdainfully.

"A lot of good that did them, huh?" Kurt said, grinning at him wickedly. "My son isn't the one who should be expelled."

"Gentlemen," Abby said in a sigh, her hands folded tightly on the desk and an annoyed expression on her face. "Mr. Karofsky, you're free to go. Happy birthday, Xander, I'm sorry you had to spend it this way."

"Excuse me, but-"

"I will be right with you, Mr. Elliot," Abby said, lifting a hand at him and glaring before looking back at Kurt. "If you stop by the nurses station she will give you an ice pack for his face."

Kurt nodded and shot a smirk at the other man before muttering a, "Thank you" to the principle and walking out, continuing to pet at Xander's ruffled curls, carrying him out to the car after doing as the principle suggested, settling down into a crouched position once Xander was seated in his car seat and the ice pack was being held up to his nose. "Happy Birthday, kiddo."

He gave a weak smile, sniffing slightly. "Thanks..."

"I have a surprise for you, ya know," Kurt informed him.

"What is it?" He asked, his eyes lighting up a little.

"If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise, silly," He said, grinning and kissing his forehead.

"Well, when can I know?"

"When we get home," He said, smiling slightly and slipping out of the car and into his seat, watching as Xander bounced and shifted eagerly in the back. The grin stayed on his face.

Xander, in spite of still holding the little duck icepack against his cheeks and alternate every three minutes, practically flung himself out of the car when they pulled into the driveway, shuffling back and forth anxiously as he waited for Papa to get out of the car and hold his hand as he tugged him forward to the front door. "Can you unlock it, Papa?"

Kurt shook his head. "You have to knock this time," He said. "Or do you want me to?"

Xander beamed, obviously sensing something exciting, and he tapped his little fist against the door, bouncing on the balls of his feet and obviously trying to hide a wide smile. Kurt held back a giggle, and literally had to force his throat and lungs to constrict when his husband, currently known as Hagrid, opened the door. Kurt noticed his hazel eyes widen at the bruising on his sons face, but he quickly shook it off when Xander's jaw fell slack because holy-mother-of-God-a-Harry-Potter-character-is-at-my-door! David cleared his throat. "Oh, hello...I'm sorry but I'm in no fit state to entertain today."

He slammed the door and Kurt's shoulders began slowly shuddering in a fit of suppressed giggles, and when he heard a muffled, "Sit there you stupid winged creature. Sit. SIT." coming from inside he had to clench the hand Xander wasn't holding into a fist and bite down on it. Straight face, he told himself. Straight face straight face straight face...

"Papa!" Xander cried, looking at Kurt with wide eyes. "How...he...why is he...Papa, I-"

"Okay, okay, calm down baby boy," Kurt said, chuckling and kneeling down. "Do you remember in the movies? What Harry said? To...Hagrid when he told him and Ron and Hermione that exact same thing?"

Xander thought about it a minute before he knocked on the door again, grabbing Kurt's hand as soon as he finished and waiting until it creaked open and a tired, "Now, _what_ did I _just_ say, boy-" snuck out before Xander cried loud enough, Kurt was positive every single one of the neighbors could hear it, "I know! I, um, no, we know! We know about the scor-cer-ers stone!"

Kurt giggled again but didn't bother smothering it this time, letting Xander walk forward a few steps after David mumbled an awkward, "Oh..Oh, well then, all right," and Kurt took a moment to admire his and his husbands skill. He'd covered the furniture with Ravenclaw colors (because Xander had this fixation with Ravenclaw, for some reason), hid the TV and things behind long black cloths, stapled paper bricks onto the walls and dressed the tables with fancy table cloths. He nodded, smirking at the pouting owl sitting in the corner (he borrowed it from a friend- you'd be surprised the things you could get your hands on when you had friends on Broadway) and nodding again. This was perfect.

But it couldn't compare to the look that crossed over Xander's face when he recognized the height and voice and eye color of the man parading around as Hagrid. David, despite his whiny grumbles, loved dressing up for his boy. As Santa for Christmas, as a puppy for Halloween, as a giant teddy bear for Valentine's Day...and now, as Hagrid, for his birthday. But this was the first time Xander had ever figured it out. "Daddy?"

And David was too startled by his baby boys battered face to lie to him. "Hey, Squirt."

Xander's face took on one of joy and fear and he glanced up at Kurt, waiting until he kneeled down to whisper, "Will he be mad at me?"

Kurt shook his head. "No...no, of course not, baby."

"What, I don't get a hug?" David asked, crouching down and collecting his son up in a bone-crushing hug before standing up again and looking at Kurt over his shoulder. Kurt mouthed, 'I'll tell you later' before snaking around them to make sure all the food was ready and set up. When he came back, Xander was seated on David's knee, both of them on the couch, looking very engaged in whatever they were talking about. Kurt felt his lips curl up in a smile and nodded to himself, deciding to just watch for a little while, at least until David poked Xander's tummy and made him snicker, and they both made their way over to Kurt and the kitchen.

Rachel and Jesse showed up soon after that, as did Burt, Paul, Finn and his wife Meghan, along with Brittany and Santana. Burt and Paul had moved to the suburbs of New York to be closer to the boys (though it was quite obvious they just wanted to get out of Lima), and Santana was just in love with the state, which meant Brittany was sure to follow. It was nice, though. Having the whole family there- even if Rachel and Finn hardly made eye contact with each other.

And still, Kurt just couldn't get over Xander, curled up on David's lap at the end of the night, holding a wand in his hands and wearing a pair of fake Harry Potter glasses while he gripped the plush Hedwig to his chest firmly, two thick arms wrapped around him tightly and protectively and a fake beard being used as a pillow.

Then again, he didn't think he'd ever want to get over that site.

"Come on now, Hagrid," Kurt said, jostling David from his 'day'dreaming state. "Let's get both of you put to bed."

David snorted, standing up slowly and stifling a yawn as he and Kurt wandered up the stairs after flicking the lights off and checking to make sure they'd locked the door after the last of the guests had left. Kurt took Xander from David so the other man could go get himself ready, and the younger man took his sleeping boy into the bedroom, just lying him down under the sheets instead of making him wake up. It was late, after all, and he looked so content...Kurt would just wash those clothes tomorrow. Maybe they'd have a pajama day, or something.

Kurt clicked the light off and stepped back into his own room, recognizing the man in a pair of boxers and a tee-shirt more than the thing that stepped right out of the movie obsession. "Mmm, there's my man."

David looked up and blushed, rubbing the back of his neck as Kurt tiptoed over to him and pressed a small kiss to the corner of his mouth, which David eagerly reciprocated, his hand slipping around Kurt's waist and resting on the small of his back. Kurt smiled, quickly getting rid of his own over shirt and jeans and replacing them with his tank and flannel pajama bottoms before crawling under the sheets and snuggling up against David's chest. "I love you," He whispered between tiny kisses to David's jawline.

David grinned. "I love you, too, Fancy."

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***starts biting my fist for the hope my teeth don't fall out from all this cotton candy fluff I keep writing omg***  
**Ahem...anyhow. Again...very late...but I'm trying...I hate RL, guys, I honestly do :'( WAH. Not happy.**  
**So this is day 6, which was Friday, and then In 10 Years...which is ignoring the crap out of me... *glares* BOYS COME ON! *sigh* ...anyway. Gonna go try that again.**  
**Anyhow...well...Happy Kurtofsky week! (even if it is over...how did this happen so fast?)**


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